A brown-eyed five-year-old looked in my eyes and said, “I don’t want to be alone.” This wasn’t in response to being left in aisle 7 at Costco for less than ten seconds. This wasn’t a response to some other recent event in his life. This was a reaction to the human condition: we don’t want to be alone.

The people in the white coats have a name for it. It’s called “monophobia.”

“Monophobia is the fear of being alone. This catch-all term includes several discrete fears which may or may not share a common cause, like the fear of:

• Being apart from a particular person
• Being home alone
• Feeling isolated or ignored
• Living alone
• Loneliness
• Solitude

verywellmind.com

You’ve likely been a part of this kind of conversation in your station’s hallways.

“The client wants us to give away vacuum cleaners or we won’t get the buy.”

“The morning show will give clues for 30 days. Listeners go to the website and submit their guesses, and anyone that gets all 30 correct will be a finalist…”

Jeepers! The fact that there are even 629 of these Frost Advisories (every week for over a dozen years) might suggest that there is a lot to this programming stuff. I reckon’ that’s so, and I love discussing higher concepts with smart people, but I also know there are some simple truths.

A simple truth is that there are only two distinct elements to programming a radio station.

Music and words

These are the only tools we have to impact lives, achieve ratings, to make revenue goals, or to hang gold records in the lobby to show visitors that we are really, really a neat station.

It is said that Michelangelo is the greatest influence on western art in the last 500 years. As a devoutly religious man, most of his sculptures, paintings, architecture works, and poetry were in service to the church. His most famous painting depicts the book of Genesis on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel at the Vatican. Centuries later lines of tourists still form to see his work because of its excellence.

His most famous sculpture is of David as a young warrior. When asked how he was able to create his masterpiece, he responded simply,

“I just took away everything that didn’t look like David.”

Back to school time is everywhere. In the stores with sales. On our neighborhood streets with school buses. There are even tax-free days for Back to School. It’s not an official holiday like Christmas, Ground Hog Day, or Millard Fillmore’s birthday, but it is just as evident.

Back to school affects everyone’s schedule, even those that don’t go to school. That’s Common Ground. (Can’t say that about ole’ Millard’s birthday.)

“The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.”

Tom Bodett

So, let’s go back to school and discuss what really matters in transforming your station’s programming.

This week’s Frost Advisory is about something that we all inherently know. But as we approach another political season, understanding your listeners’ worldview will help you avoid potential potholes. After all, I live in the same county as Mar-a-Lago. You can thank me later.

Sure, we understand that targeting is important, but there is more to it than just demo, gender, ethnicity, and shoe size.

“To see things in the same way it helps to be standing in the same place looking in the same direction at the same thing.”

Roy Williams or unknown author or someone else

What’s coming out of the speakers?

Mostly I’m invited into a radio station with the thought that I might impact what’s coming out of the speakers. And while it’s true that excellence in programming can fuel a station’s growth and impact, there is an aspect of that transformation that can be easily overlooked.

On last week’s show I shared how our minds crave simplicity. Our ego seduces us to consider things close to us as more important than things more distant.

I’m often brought into conversations about a dip in the ratings or a fundraiser falling short of the goals. (Rarely do we have these conversations when things are humming along). The quick answers are always telling.

First, they are always simple. “We’re playing too much Praise and Worship.” “We’re playing too little Praise and Worship.” “We need more variety.” “My neighbor doesn’t listen anymore.”

Rita in accounting will inevitably react with, “We’re not playing enough tobyMac.” Or too much.

Her name was Jane. She was the first girl I ever asked out on a date. She said no.

I convinced myself that it was because of the big zit on my forehead. Or that I wasn’t the quarterback on the football team. I found out later it was because she and her family went out of town.

We think we’re pretty important, don’t we?

It’s tempting to think our station fans’ (P1s’) behavior is a direct result of our programming tactics. I’ve hear otherwise reasonable people exclaim that ratings went up because of the new jingles, ratings went down because we didn’t hit the spot breaks within the bow tie, or question our ratings because we didn’t have a specific number of songs on our playlist. I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP, as Dave Barry would say. (See Frost Advisory #221-Up Is Good And Down Is Bad)

It’s the question I ask of every air talent somewhere in the coaching process.

And it’s not because I want them to talk about themselves. It’s because I want them to relate to their listeners as real human beings, not as deejays just sharing information.

The more human you are the more people will relate to you.